June 9,2012
••• on that day, I was playing a soccer game, it was arena soccer. I don't remember much of the day in fact I don't remember that at all. I don't remember waking up that morning, I don't remember getting ready for my soccer game that morning. In that soccer game I got tripped, broke the fall with my head and got a terrible concussion. The next thing I knew or well remember from the day is waking up in an ambulance with flashing light into my eyes and shouting my name. I didn't know where I was who I was or what the hell had happened. I remember feeling is numb, I couldn't feel my legs, and I couldn't feel my hands. The paramedic was asking me a load of questions that I should of known that answer to. And I got to the hospital not knowing anything a lady walked into the room and said hey sweetie, I had no idea she was. I was so scared I didn't remember anything that had happened to me I didn't know who the lady was who ended up being my mother, I didn't know who my siblings were I didn't know any of my family I forgot all my friends forgot what school I went to and forgot what my name was and who I was. From that day I didn't remember anything I didn't remember 13 years of life. So yes, I can say I was able to start my life over, I may not of known anyone that I knew who they were in my heart. Yes losing my memory was scary but it was also the greatest blessing I have ever received. I got to start over, I got to meet new friends, I got to re-create myself and who I wanted to be. It was hard, it was scary but but if I had to go back to that day I would still play that game, the one that caused me to lose all my memory. People think my depression started from my accident but really who is depressed since third grade, you see I kept a journal, that apparently I wrote in every day, I was bullied I had major depression. No I don't remember it but I surely felt all the sadness when I woke up in ambulance. Every day since that day has been a constant struggle, there are some days where I can't even wake up, can't even get out of bed and function right, I don't have a lot of friends because for me it's so hard making friends. I don't fit in it's school and I learned to be okay with that. I have about 4 friends at school and I'm okay with that. Just because I've suffered from depression & lost my memory doesn't make me any less of a person.
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